On the second floor of a quiet farmer's market...Such light as there will be today has not yet revealed herself--still under the cover of night's starbright blanketing. It is a lovely thing to be back in this space after what feels like a long time-- eight weeks. I suppose that is a long while when speaking of a meaningful ritual.
I have been trying to write a blog entry but nothing unified coming forth-- only images and phrases of these last weeks...and the rather sudden realization that my image of God involves all of my senses...The peace I see in Van Gogh's room; the pleasing chaos of patterns in Matisse; the warming tangy spice and the bite of a short glug of lemon or rice wine vinegar in a hearty-hardy soup ; the rise and release of sung passion in full-bodied freedom--an opera aria, in Gospel music, in the perfection of hip-hop syllables and rhythms; the memory of being held by a friend and hearing "It will all be okay..." when I couldn't believe it for myself; the bloom inside with the first sip of coffee; the trembling courage to do or speak or accept a difficult or beautiful truth; the astounding diversity of creation--all of the colour, texture, light...the contours of language; the beauty of the human body with its curves and quirks; the capacity of the mind and the heart to meet in imagination and see things that have never before been seen--to design, to invent, sculpt, write, discover; the fullness of silence, the infinite horizon of the sea; All of this and more and more and more and Mystery...are a part of my image of you.
Hm, maybe that word needs to change...from image to experience. There is far more room in that.
The sun is as up as it is going to be today... To move my vision across the market toward what lies past the windows and out into the sea is to shift from the detailed brilliance of technicolor to an astounding stretch of monochromatic shading... I have a new appreciation for the subtleties of steel, cream, iron... Some of that color is breaking down into elemental fog and snow that I can see heading this way. Time to get going into the day ahead.
Thank you for the freedom of time and alone...Thank you for this...Thank you for the stretch and ache of Love.